This is a Trip Report from the Economy cabin
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So i was waiting in Grantley Adams International, thankfully the air-con was just about right. i had been there some hours when i saw the Virgin Pretty woman land.
I thought immeadiatly Great!!! i Wanted that plane on the outbound flight and here it is on the inbound!! so I looked at the time and thought, this is excellent... in just 3 short hours i shall be on board and on my way home!!
HOW WRONG WAS I!!!
I detected something was wrong at about 3pm, (the flight usually leaves at 16.45/17.00) The flight crew for BA were already on board and i had yet to see any flight crew. The flight deck looked empty as well. I started to feel slightly uneasy, My Mother had to be at work at 9.50 GMT and i had to be at work to 14.00GMT.
At 4pm Ba started their boarding calls, I was yet to see a pilot, flight attendant and again... i felt anxious, so did many of the other virgin customers who had by now twigged that something was wrong. American airlines had two flights leave and soon the BA had left the tarmac. My mother approached the turnaround manager in her red skirt and yellow tabard.
"Excuse me, sorry to bother you. It's getting on for time. i know we are likely delayed but; i've not seen anyone, Do we have a pilot??"
The turnaround manger smiled stoically ( but suspect she may have pooped a little)
"As soon as we have resolved a few things, we shall let you know"
My mother becoming increasingly worried, phoned work on her mobile. My father phoned my uncle who is always fastideous about time, who would likely be waiting for us at gatwick a long time.
At this point a rather harried mother of toddlers came past us huffing "Two ****ing hours, we won't fly till 7 o'****ing clock. **** this ****" Charming woman, manners of a saint. Her speech silenced all in a two metre radius. Suddenly the Turnaround manager was met by a deluge of Furious/confused/hungry/tired people.
Always good in a crisis my father fell asleep. my sister overindulged in sweets and started feeling unwell and my mother and i sat on our hands.
We went through all the scenarios. Maybe the whole flight crew had caught food poisoning and we would have to wait until tommorrow, The charming huffy lady injected one of her own "maybe they had too much of a ******* jolly and they are all hungover" I prayed that we were sitting nowhere near this woman whose mouth seemed to be spilling effluence, she clearly didn't care who heard her. Maybe they had all gone on strike??? Nah, didn't seem like it, but that would be a perfect place to go on strike. and so at 17.15 i saw like a vision two men with their uniforms. followed at irregular intervals by flight attendants.
My rationale that the flight crew had been struck down by food poisoning looked likely, as if the people who were arriving had been called out early. They didn't look like they worked together regularly, as if they were arriving in friendship groups and didn't know the others.
It was right then after the 10th flight attendant arrived that charming huffy woman made proclaimation that made my blood run cold. "yeah it's alright, be late. If i were late i wouldn't get on the flight, just watch, i'm going to have them running up and down all night" I made a pray to god that she would have a large Glass of alcohol and fall asleep she was a fool (yes i'm making a more polite substitution for what i actually thought)We were so lost in thought i totally missed the moment that a jordanian avaition landed. It was some narrow bodied plane, i didn't think they could fly across the atlantic and i'd never seen one in this part of the world, ordinarily i would have been overwhelmed with excitement, but i was now exhausted.
Then mother and i realised that we were a person short.... dear old dad was still sleeping on the chair. My sister now worried that the day had descended into complete chaos exclaimed " don't you guys worry, i'll get him, how could we leave him behind" she was like an action hero leaping over chairs and through the crowd at light sleep. she pinched him and picked up his bag and dragged the bleary eyed man towards us.
We boarded and sat down. it must have been nearing six if not quarter past. Instead of being relaxed i was quite tense.Worrying about my mother we would likely arrive at 8am, oh well nothing i could help. Then the pilot came on the announcement, explaining our estimated arrival time.
I could tell we were in a hurry, i have never felt a plane that size taxi so fast.
The IFE, was superior in actual quality, everyone's worked. other than that we felt short changed, no games, no ability to listen to the radio while watching the skymap.
However i did enjoy my film,after laughing out loud i was cautioned to be quiet as many people are try to sleep.
The meal was okay. beef and rice. In the middle of the night i was awakened, i'm not sure by what, but there was an announcement from the captain asking that we all take our seats, because of turbulance. Now that is a sure way to keep me awake, i hate turbulance. Then i saw a few flight attendants take four women from somewhere at the back and suddenly i noticed a restrained man being escorted to the back. Being tired i thought nothing of it and went back to my comedy.
I was awakened later by the gentle glow of morning dawning. we were served breakfast... bacon in ciabatta.... yum!!!
I asked mother if she felt any turbulance, she said she had slept like a lamb. odd i thought. I must have done too!!
Then we landed. Sweet mercy i have never been so glad to see blighty!! we were cautioned to keep our seatbelts on and remained seated until told otherwise. Then Armed Police boarded the plane
I had images of that charming woman smashing up the joint or something, but low it was just that man.... (i've been scouring the news but have found nothing, do people act the fool that offen that it's not newsworthy??)we disembarked and i sighed a breath of relief. I was home and dry, or so i thought, until some child vomited on my case after baggage reclaim.
